This is the second post in a series entitled “Basics of Happiness.” This series allows me to explain my take on happiness and what I believe to be useful steps on the journey to happiness as a state of being. The content in this series is also the foundation of my book-in-progress.

Like Be Ready, the title of this post may have you up in arms.  “Really choose?  Does anyone not really choose to be happy???”  And, also like Be Ready, the answer might surprise you.

YES.

In fact, if a person isn’t happy, chances are pretty good that she or he is not really choosing to be happy.  This is commonly disputed by the idea that, while one might be choosing to be happy, life circumstances are preventing said happiness.  This is not actually possible.  Have you ever met a happy homeless person?  Perhaps a happy person in the throes of a terminal disease?  A happy person who has survived terrible abuse?  A happy person who has suffered extreme loss?

YES.

So, knowing that happiness is not dependent on circumstances or external sources, how do we begin to really choose?

First, we must understand what it is we’re choosing. When I refer to happiness, I don’t mean pleasure.  I don’t mean success.  I don’t mean wealth.  Yes, it is those things and more, but it is not only those things.  When I refer to happiness, I don’t mean a transient, superficial feeling or experience.  I do mean happiness as a state of being.  As with any state of being, happiness is prone to fluctuation.  Emotions are natural – all of them – and must be experienced as such.  But when you choose to be happy as a state of being, what you’re really choosing is to shift your baseline state to one of happiness and joy.

What is your baseline state now?  Take a moment to do this exercise.

Sit alone in a quiet room.  Tune into your breathing.  Focus on it as you quiet your mind.  Push everything else away, just for a moment.  Don’t worry, it’ll all be there for you when you come back.  Really quiet your mind, as best you can.  Then, take stock of what you feel.  With everything else removed, what goes on inside?  Do you feel happy?  Sad?  Mad?  Lonely?  Scared?  This is your baseline state of being.

Are you content with what you’ve discovered?  Or do you wish to change your baseline state of being?  The first step in really choosing is to understand that, at the most basic level, this is your choice.

Next post:  More to help you really choose.